Posted by: gdevi | July 12, 2011

Tonka Truck, badonka donk, Donkey-kong; Virginia Here I Come!!!

This past week I have had the misfortune to listen to Clear Channel radio stations repeatedly on our way back and forth from Lock Haven to Assateague and back. When she was little, D. listened to the old geezer stations that we listen to in the car–classic rock, jazz and NPR — but now that she is eleven, she gets to pick the radio station on car trips. It was unbelievable. Once in a while we did listen to NPR, jazz and classic rock, but it was mostly Clear Channel listening area that we were driving through. Listening to Clear Channel is like starring in Ground Hog day over and over again; you think you are done with Britney Spears speaking like a chipmunk but that was in York, PA, and now here she is all over again with the exact same chipmunk voice in some little town outside of Baltimore. I don’t know what I will do if I was Britney Spears’ mother; I think I will renounce the world and retire to the mountains. I am astounded that someone can sing so badly. What is even stranger to me was this new song by Katy Perry about having sex with an alien. It used to be that in order to show your rebellion in pop songs you had sex with the wrong race–black man white woman, white man black woman, white man green woman, orange woman aubergine man whatever– or from the wrong neighborhood, wrong side of the track–good girl bad boy, bad girl good boy etc–but they have run out of all inspiration in upping the ante on weird couplings. So space is the final frontier and Katy Perry wants to have sex with an alien. The song is called Supernatural. It says things like Stun me with your laser, Fill me with your poison, I wanna be there when you vibrate, you are supernatural extraterrestrial. What in the world has pop music come to? Sex has always been the subtext of pop music but this is so tasteless. I am trying to remember all the excruciating songs that I heard.  There was Lady Gaga on the edge, she was on the edge so many times that I sang the Van Halen song Jump.  There is Jennifer Lopez who has ripped off the old Lambada –a beautiful song for a beautiful dance — in a song called “On the floor” where she invites us to “pump it up like a Tonka truck”–Tonka truck? Tonka truck?–watch the “badonka donk get Donkey-konged”? What language is this? I teach linguistics and this is right out of the Urban dictionary. How can you write a song with urban dictionary slang?  “J Lo” wants you to do this from “Vegas to Africa.” Vegas is a city. Africa is a continent. What kind of parallelism is this? Who are these people?

There is nothing to any of these songs. When there is nothing, then package it with sex. And sell it to kids. So sad.

D. wants to add her own thoughts on all of this; go ahead, honey.

Title: Virginia Here I Come!!!

Well, as many of you may not know… This is the Great D. telling you the  “real story” of our vacation to the Chincoteague and Assateague Islands,VA! So, let’s take it from the beginning. I’ll tell you straight off that obviously driving from Pennsylvania to Virginia is drivable so it only took us (meaning me, my mom,and my dad) about 7 hours, which by the way is a really long time for me!! But, thank goodness for clear channel radio because I would have been miserable just listening to jazz, and old rock. My ears crave the sound of rap and hip hop. My brain craves the puzzle of decoding the babbled words (as my mom would say) to clearly spoken words:)! My Dad, whenever he hears rap starts babbling on and off trying to sound just like the rapper whether it’s Pit bull, Dr.Dre, Lil’Wayne, etc. So anyways, we spent about the whole trip listening to the “heavenly music”, but then the time came when we had to stop the truck engine, and unpack our bags. We stayed at a Bed n’ Breakfast called The Channel Bass Inn. We were exhausted the first day, but the day after, we drove to the beach, and I got to listen to my “special music”!! I got in the water and jumped some waves!!!:) We did the same thing for most of the time until the last 2 days, which we filled up with bike riding, sea shell collecting ( also dead sea animal remains like a horseshoe crab’s tail)and for my mom, exploring the innkeeper garden. In between times of our days we spent at the island, we saw its main treasure… the wild horses of Chincoteague and Assateague Islands!YAY! My mom was in heaven for that short time she was surrounded by flowers! We went for a cruise that was very fun. We went past a sand bar, and saw a sea turtle, and the lone wild stallion that got kicked out of the group for being once the leader and getting defeated by a younger stallion. This old horse had no family or herd with him. I guess that’s why they call him the” lone horse.” On the last day of our vacation we went to the beach early in the morning and we got many shells, but we also as well walked away from the “humans” far down the beach, and saw dolphin jumping over waves, coming our way!! I would recommend coming to these islands for a nice family vacation, but who am I to be telling you guys about what your vacation should be like! It was all about the rap man!!

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